Old Friends
A friend I met in 1990 and haven’t spoken with in eleven years found me on Facebook. I was so excited to see her beautiful face. We knew each other in college, though we went to different schools in different states. We used to send postcards to each other every week, with awesome multi colored crayola skinny markers in fun shades. (This was before email, cell phones and social networking were so common). She was my friend over mountains and miles. Her life has taken some turns, as have all of ours. I was sad to hear about her divorce but delighted about remarriage. Sad that I wasn’t there to listen through it all but glad to see what a large and believing community she has surrounding her.
Old friends. They bring up and out some terrible and amazing feelings. Seeing her facebook page was a delight. By the same token, there are people from my past who, upon finding me on facebook, would surely be “ignored.” I do not want to see them, talk to them, reunite in any fashion.
I am reminded of that old Simon and Garfunkel song, old friends, bookends…blah blah blah. There are parts of my youth that gladden my heart. She was part of that. There are parts I purposely avoid. Isn’t that how we manage life? How we stumble through doing our best and striving to live a way that is intentional?
The apostle Paul writes that when a new life comes the old passes away. It is forever gone. But even he couldn’t change his past. Instead, he used it for the betterment of his community. The fact is we are not only shaped by the “good” times, memories, decisions, events. We are shaped as well by our failings, our mistakes, our junk.
I am so glad she found me. I am happy about her life. It makes me thing of my own. Have I made good choices? What would be different if I had…? What would I change if I could go back one year, five years, ten? Am I the person I thought I’d be?
This is my first intentionally long blog post and I’m sure I started writing before I was ready to. The fact is, connecting with her again has raised some pretty powerful questions for me. I hope to have the discipline and the courage to address them.
